A Workshop with Gargoyles

When we moved into our house just under two years ago I took the opportunity to set up my workshop while we were in the “fresh start” mode. The house is a big old colonial with one of those spacious attics that has windows, its own staircase, and hardwood floors. Sounds perfect, eh? Well there’s the original 123 year old slate roof, no insulation, a temperamental chimney, and no screens on the windows. Enter slate dust clouds, 95 degree summer days which mean 120 degree attic days, lovely waterfalls on the sides of the chimney, and me dodging angry bees. And you know what? It is perfect!

By last April the attic was cleaned and ready for the shop furniture. Of course I had a little fun and was sure to put up apple green shelving units. I had the windows propped open with those metal screen inserts creating a nice cross breeze. Ahhhh, so there I was in all of my glory putting together my workbench and humming along with the radio while Justin was trying to bring sexy back *cough*. Actually, I think I was blaring Metallica. You know, always trying to please the neighbors. Sweet kitty was sitting on the top step of the staircase watching quietly over the ‘construction site’ when I suddenly noticed that she was very interested in what was going on above my head. Hmmmm. My eyes shifted upwards and I caught a shadow move quickly over my head. A hot wave of panic grabbed my stomach as I realized what evil winged creature was casting the shadow down onto my innocent little head. For it was the king of the hornets himself!

That hornet looked like one of the gargoyles watching over Cathedral Notre Dame with his snarling face and six foot wing span. Only a slight exaggeration, trust me. You must understand as you read this that I am terrified of winged critters that sting and/or bite. Terrified. I’ll sit in a room with rabid wolf or a twelve foot snake before I get in there with a bee or wasp. You think I’m kidding.

I let out a screech and made for the stairs. Tools and screws flying in every direction as my foot hit the first step. Sweet kitty was long gone and I had a clear path down the wooden stairs. As I rounded the turn at the bottom I grabbed the door handle and swung on its hinges as it slammed shut. I leaned my back against the door panting and looking around wildly making sure the hungry gargoyle didn’t follow me down to gobble me up. Phew, I was safe.

After I regained my composure I made a move to go downstairs and get the bee spray from the pantry, but after two steps I ran right into my husband’s chest. *Phwooomph* His face morphed from concerned to mildly amused as he started to catch on to what had happened, “everything…..alright up here?”

Holding my arms as wide as they would go, “it was huge…er…massive…and very, very angry!”

He turned to head back downstairs, “uhmm-hmmm, I thought you had taken the roof with ya’ there for a second…my brave one. Oh and, the Raid is on the second shelf to the left.”

The shop was completed by May and came fully equipped with every bee spray available on the market. They even have their own shelf, over to the right of course as I am indeed a rightie. Let the battles begin...